American HAYYYYYYYYYdol

After 8 seasons,
have I become too jaded a fan?

After their fruitless championing of Archuleta last year,
have I finally tired of all the judges' pimping?



Or is this really the most mind-numbingly
boring cast of characters ever in American Idol history?

SPANX does a SIMON:

>>> Li'l Rounds is a lot boring


>>> Matt Giraud compared to Michael Bublé?
The judges must all be drinking from
Paula's glass of Coke this year.


>>> Danny Gokey did a Carrie Underwood
and lost control of the wheel. Jesus!!!


>>> Anoop is like a Country Waffle:
square, lightweight, and quite tasteless
without the extra (hype) syrup.


>>> Scott, the visually-impaired piano man?
All his songs sound like monotonous Elton John rejects.
Sorry, but pimping and pandering to this very mediocre singer
is actually quite insulting to people with disabilities.


>>> Adam squealed like a sow stuck in a farm fence.
Prrof? Google Ned Beatty in the movie "Deliverance"


>>> Randy Travis is Keith Richard's country bumpkin cousin;
he can play Jack Sparrow's Uncle from the Americas
in the next Pirates of the Caribbean sequel.

There's one saving grace though...

she's a bit of nut,
she's sometimes out of tune,
she's got tattoos straight out of Miami Ink,
she's got dance moves like Seinfeld's Elaine,

but she's the one True Original this year:

I love MEGAN!!!