The Three Reasons Why GMA Appointed MARK LAPID as the New General Manager of the Philippine Tourism Authority (PTA)
for losing candidates in the 2007 Elections has expired,
and GMA has wasted no time in handing out
the proverbial bones to her grateful lapdogs.
Expect Prospero Pichay, Mike Defensor, Chavit Singson,
Tito Sotto, Ralph Recto, and Tessie Aquino-Oreta,
last year's high-profile, big-spending "Senatoriable"
losers to be back in the limelight soon.
But first up,
a man with pending cases of "gross incompetence"
filed against him in the Ombudsman's office
due to suspiciously low quarrying collections
during his lone term as Governor of Pampanga,
a man with extensive executive experience owing
to his being a SK Chairman in Porac,
a man who starred in the classic Filipino film
"Dugong Aso: Mabuting Kaibigan, Masamang Kaaway",
THE TOP 3 REASONS WHY MARK LAPID
WAS APPOINTED TO HEAD THE P.T.A.:
1. "SAGING LANG ANG MAY PUSO"
GMA may want to strengthen the perception
of the Philippines as her "Banana Republic";
Mark Lapid's SIGNATURE LINE (and theme song!)
is the perfect motto for this campaign:
Boracay is now over-developed and overcrowded;
it's time to provide an alternative destination.
Set amidst the lahar-devastated town of Porac,
it's time for the world to discover PORACAY!!!
3. "THE KOREAN CONNECTION"
Almost a million Koreans visit the Philippines yearly,
and despite his denials, there is concrete evidence
that Mark Lapid really really loves the Koreans.
He was once married, and fathered a child with,
a Korean lady named Yuri Park.