Wednesday, May 28, 2008

ÜBERKILL



AAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

If I get one more text from one of my 'friends' saying
"Gutom na ME", I'll reply with a text stating that
our fu-budding friendship is terminated imMEdiately.



AAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

If I hear one more sportscaster saying an unnecessary
"OF COURSE" when he just wants to say "Syempre...",
I'll sic the ghost of the great Joe Cantada on him.




AAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

If I see one more dumbass Kapamilya or Kapuso sputtering a
"BASICALLY" when these airheads actually mean "Eh, kasi...",
I swear I'll smack them on the head with a Webster's Unabridged.



AAAARRRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!

If I read ÜBER used one more time in a blog post,
I'll smote it with some good Old Testament wrath;
it's basically überused, of course. Pagod na Me!





That's how I usually start off my corporate POWER ENGLISH modules
and IELTS review classes for U.S.-bound nurses
and migrants to Canada,



where together with my excellent co-teachers,

Agatha, Sam, Red, Jam, Tony, and Teddy,

we try to restore the Pinoy's English Proficiency Skills,
ONE WORD AT A TIME.



It's Tough Love,
but it certainly works, baby!!!



p.s.

I suggest you substitute "absolutely" for "über",
"actually" or "essentially" for "basically",
"certainly" for "of course",

and

"hoy, gago! gutom na 'ko" for "gutom na me"!!!

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your 'brochure' has tons of spelling and syntax errors. I give you one hint: 'optimism' is spelled with just two i's.

June 2, 2008 at 10:09 AM  

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