"THE WINE SUCKS"

Quite a few Filipino "celebrities" use

TWITTER

as a mass-texting utility:

one tweet, thousands of recipients!!!

Does it feed their ego to have a lot of "followers"

who react to their every utterance,

vapid, insipid, or otherwise?

Perhaps...

until they tweet something really irresponsible or improper,

and they discover that, as was said in the film

The Social Network:

"the internet is written in ink"

What to Wear, WHAT TO WEAR?!?!?!

Should I go with my favorite

MAKIN' BACON

or

should I try something new and go

UNPLUGGED???

The Perfect Movie for HALLOWEEN....

Three Teenagers

stranded on a ski lift,

fifty feet up in the air,

and the whole mountain resort

isolated for the next five days...

as intense as

DEEP WATER

as terrifying as

PARANORMAL ACTIVITY

as horrifying as

THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT

BUY ONE, TAKE ONE at STARBUCKS!!!

For any Crème Brûlée Machiatto beverage,

until tomorrow only, October 28, 2010:

in celebration of 400,000 fans of

Starbucks Philippines on

FACEBOOK!!!

And just one week from now,

the Starbucks Planner

sticker madness will resume, along

with the return of my beloved treat...

Must. Call. GREENWICH. Now.

DESSERT comes FIRST!!!

BUTTERFINGER chocolate oatmeal cookie,

topped with Vanilla ice cream,

drizzled with Chocolate syrup,

and sprinkled with BUTTERFINGER bits!!!

And if that still leaves you wanting more...

Oh, and the new Pizzas are pretty interesting too:

VAMPIRES are sooo Five Minutes Ago!!!

True Blood : getting LAME

Vampire Diaries : even LAMER

The Twilight Saga : forever LAMEST

Call it a "bloody overdose":

bloodsuckers are dripping everywhere you look...
from the shelves of National Bookstore to the
Kapamilya network to the Quiapo DBD stalls.

We've gotten so over-familiar and over-saturated
with Dracula's kind, that they have lost all
mystery, they have lost all semblance of
sexiness, and let's face it, they just
aren't that scary anymore, right?




It's time for the more terrifying kind of undead...





The First TV Series about ZOMBIES!!!


It's from the Director of THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION
and from the Producer of THE TERMINATOR. Classics.

With that kind of pedigree, this is rated: AWESOME!!!
















ZOMBIES take over the City of London,
and the last remaining survivors are those
"trapped" in, where else? The BIG BROTHER U.K. house!


A 5-part mini-series, complete and uncensored;
in the Queen's English, with Italian (!) subtitles.


You can watch the whole zombierrific series on YouTube:

Ang PROBLEMA natin mga PILIPINO...

Masyado tayong Mabilis Makalimot,

at Masyado tayong Mapagpatawad.

This INGRATE returns to TV tonight,

while a PERVERT hypes his perfume line.

Are you WILLING to bet it's going to take less than 6 months

before the first scandal rocks this new WILLIE show?

Breaking his silence: “I felt so humiliated and hopeless,”

recalls Hayden Kho as he faces the camera for an

exclusive pictorial for The Philippine Star.

"... he released all feelings straight from his

wounded and repentant heart.

There were moments of teary-eyed sighs,

laughter, happiness, and peace."

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

One of Jessica Zafra's funniest and most memorable
columns was entitled "The Purple Prose of Baguio";

her co-columnist in the PHILIPPINE STAR
may just be the new Paragon of Purple Prose...


"If humility makes a man elegant and sexy,
then Hayden Kho is probably the most elegant
and sexiest man I have met lately.

It helps that he speaks in a gentle voice,
that he is absolutely handsome,
that he is brawny and brainy as well.

Oh, okay, I gush."


Look, I realize that Hayden Kho
is good copy and all, but did the writer
really have to go overboard and practically
exculpate this pervert? Ms. Mananquil "GUSHED"...

Read the rest here:

THE SCENT of a CARELESS WHISPER


Oh, and there's zero mention of the videotaped ladies
whose careers and lives the Disgraced Doctor
almost ruined. This kind of Insensitivity
under the guise of a P.R. fluff piece?

APPALLING.

Aloha Again... HAWAII FIVE-O!!!

why I ♥ this show:

First,
it's got the same iconic theme music,
and since thirty years have passed since
the original show (1968-1980) ended its run,
the theme now has a pounding "house" backbeat,
but it still somehow sounds exactly the same. . .

because some of the original musicians are the very
same ones performing this tricked out millennium edition!

Second,

the show retained all the legacy characters:
from the awesome Steve McGarrett to "book 'em" Dano.


Some surprises are in store though: Kono is now a hot chick!!!


And she's played by gorgeous "Boomer" from Battlestar Galactica:
Grace Park, the actress whose name sounds like a 'burb in Caloocan.

Third,
Daniel Dae Kim from LOST
is back in Hawaii (!) for this new show.


Somehow, I don't think he's really complaining.

Fourth,
Alex O'Loughlin and Scott Caan as the new
versions of partners Steve McGarrett and Dano,


have the sleekest and funniest "buddy" chemistry
since Nick Nolte and Eddie Murphy in "48 HOURS"!

This new H50 is a funny as "Chuck", and as violent
as "The Shield". How's that for a wild combination?






Fifth,
with all the FILIPINOS living in Hawaii,
it's only a matter of time until this show
features a recurring character from the Philippines;
(a la Charice's "Sunshine Corazon" from GLEE)


this week's episode finally featured PINOYS on the Big Island;
unfortunately, they were Pinoy Terrorists from Luzon (!)...

who kidnapped the daughter of
the U.S. Ambassador to the Philippines:

the villain had a surname that sounded like ARROYO,
and was played by the former football coach of GLEE.


It would have been perfect if they casted DICK ISRAEL!!!






Sixth,
the opening credits don't just use the same great music,
it's also a homage to the images of Hawaii that were
seared into our eyeballs when when we were kids;



compare the Original and 2010 opening credits,
and you'll be very pleased to see
quite a few shots that will look oh so familiar!

GLEE GONE WILD!!!

I was all set to give up on
last year's fair haired favorite TV series,

what with the lame-o plots and even lamer song
choices this year (generic Britney Spears non-hits?).


And then, Quinn Fabray and Rachel Berry showed up in GQ...

Oh my.

The Krispy Kreme of HOPIA!!!

Eng Bee Tin Hopia
the undisputed market leader,
while definitely still quite delicious,

I find to be a bit too over-processed;
as a result, their hopia filling is like Gerber:
way too smooth and soft, with flavors difficult to discern.

And that's why my new #1
is none other than Master Hopia,

with its classic soft, flaky crust,
available still warm from the oven,

with rich fillings with real textures,
exploding with extraordinary flavors!

The Condol tastes like a deluxe august Moon Cake,
the Cheese flavor tastes like Marca Pato Quezo de Bola,
Macapuno-Pandan tastes like Nathaniel's famous dessert,
and this King Size Baboy? I believe it's just like Italian Lardo!





Master Hopia:

Villalobos cor. Carlos Palanca
(right in front of the Quiapo Church)

TWO TO TRY:

Our family's staple food during our vigils
at the Good Shepherd memorial park in San Fernando,
Pampanga every All Saints Day is Fried Chicken; not just
any fried chicken, but my Lola Sally's CALAMANSI-marinated
version that's as tasty and addicting as Pancake House's similar
citrus-y Pan Chicken. I can't wait to try KFC's take on this classic!





Cheddar - Monterey Jack - Romano

Provolone - Mozzarella - Parmesan!

Can I request for Quezo de Bola and Kesong Puti on my pizza, please?

Ang Naudlot na Pagbabalik ni PONG PAGONG...

BATIBOT,

after an almost twenty year hiatus,
will return to TV screens soon on TV5.




BUT,

no thanks to unresolved licensing issues
between the U.S. Children's Television Workshop,
the owners of Sesame Street and the owners of the rights
to the most popular muppets, Pong Pagong and Kiko Matsing,

the Pinoy counterparts of Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch
will not be returning as part of the Kapatid's reborn Batibot.

Hope springs eternal though. I hope they get Arnold Clavio to sub!







Deep Dark Secret:

I appeared in one episode of Batibot:
as an ardent suitor who was wooing Ate Siena!

I remember that she was kind of ignoring my wooing,
so I had to find a "bridge" to help me get close to her.

That's right... our cupid was none other than Pong Pagong!!!

LIKE!

Thanks to the great folk over at Columbia Pictures,
I was able to catch a (very) advanced screening
of a movie I've been looking forward to
ever since I found out about it...







The film was even better than I anticipated;
so good, in fact, that I had to share my impressions
on another favorite social network of mine:





"I was an early adopter of Facebook,
perhaps one of the first Filipinos to start “poking” around
the website during those ancient days of early 2006 A.D.

Back then, the pitifully few Pinoy pioneers
didn’t know what to make of Facebook.

All our friends in the Philippines were still on Friendster,
and all our relatives from the U.S, on MySpace.

The hot new social networking site then was Multiply,
which we used like a virtual iPod:
all our music and pictures were stored and shared on that site.

But still, we joined Facebook,
because we could “throw stuff” at each other. It was cool.



Apparently, based on the new film The Social Network,
that’s exactly how the founders themselves,
led by punk-traitor-genius-billionaire Mark Zuckerberg,
felt about their own creation.

At first, they didn’t really know what it was,
or what it was going to be.
But they, too, thought that it was really cool…



As of July 2010,
500 Million people worldwide now agree that Facebook is cool.

And I’m betting that quite a few of them
will think this film is pretty cool, too..."



please CLICK here to read the rest on JUICE.ph

2 hours ago · Comment · Like · Share

as MICHAEL JORDAN once said...

"I'M BACK."