Manila Boy: 08/01/2008

UltraElectroDramaticPop!

All the music, all the videos, all the stories

from last night's controversial, long-awaited
Eraserheads Reunion Concert

that had to be cut short when lead singer Ely Buendia
collapsed onstage and had to be rushed off to a hospital:

log on to Azrael's Merryland right now!!!

Yung May PULP BITS, Siyempre!!!

Finally,
my favorite OJ is available in the Philippines!

I love Minute Maid Frozen Orange Juice;
during summers spent as a kid in SFO,
it was a new and exciting concept for me
to get a can of OJ from the freezer, and
snack on it like it was a giant "ice candy"!

In 2004, I discovered that the bottled version
was available in Beijing convenience stores,
and I became addicted to Minute Maid all over again.
I walked up the Great Wall in Badaling with an MM OJ.

For the past few years, I made it a point
to buy the very same "Imported From China" juices
whenever I'd visit the Metro Gaisano supermarkets
in Ayala Center Cebu and Market!Market! at The Fort.

And now, this outstanding orange juice
has been launched in the Philippines!!!

Now, when I finally get my hands on
a bottle of ABSOLUT MANGO,

or better yet, this Limited Special Edition
ABSOLUT NEW ORLEANS
(Mango & Black Pepper!!!)

My screwdrivers will never be the same!!!

MINUTE MAID PULPY ORANGE
P19.00 at SM Supermarkets
P25.00 at your neighborhood MiniStop/7-11

Barack Obama : The TIME is NOW!!!

In this spectacular and stirring speech,
Sen. Edward Kennedy elegantly and eloquently
passed on the torch of his party's democratic ideals

to the man who now personifies and embodies
the culmination of the civil rights that
President John F. Kennedy fought for,
almost half a century ago:

Tomorrow,
BARACK OBAMA
will formally accept the Democratic Party's
nomination as their candidate for the Presidency.

It doesn't really matter if you're an American or a Filipino,
Democrat or Republican, Leftist, Centrist, or Rightist,
Gay or Straight, White, Black, Hispanic, or Asian;

We Should All Be Witnesses to History.

Don't miss it!!!

Friday, August 29
10am Manila Time

LIVE on CNN

Upakan Na!!! PACMAN vs. GOLDEN BOY : December 7, 2008

MANNY PACQUIAO - OSCAR DE LA HOYA
in the fight of the year!!!

'nuff said!!!

SEXYBACK in the Middle Ages

It's the kinkiest series on DiBiDi.

Starring Jonathan Rhys Meyers as Henry VIII,
shagging his way through Medieval Europe,

before finally meeting his match in Anne Boleyn,
played by the luminous Natalie Dormer.

And in between all the dignified couplings,
this compelling account of the shenanigans of perpetually randy
(what else was there to do back then?)
16th Century Royals from England, France, Italy, Portugal, and Spain,

manages to teach us a history lesson or two about
St. Thomas More and Martin Luther,
and the Church of England's rebellion against the Pope in Rome.

Yes, Protestantism came about because even in the 1500s,
England's Royal Family was already Royally Horny.

NSFW : The Tudors Trailer

The Lost Art of the MIX TAPE

It was a rite of passage,
it was a confirmation of devotion,
it was the deepest expression of one's affection,
it was the music of the last romantic:

The Mix Tape.

The compilations that I would obsess over,
late into the night, and early into the morning,

my bedroom-slash-recording studio slowly exploding
in a jumbled mess of hundreds of CDs, tapes, and records,

smoking cigarette after cigarette,
taking shots of affordable Tanduay Rhum
or pilfering my dad's stash of premium Black Label and Smirnoff,

feeling every note, hyper-analyzing the song sequence,
mentally doing the arithmetic for the 45-minute sides,
making sure that my tapes were cued just right:

just the right amount of silence between the tracks
to ensure that the lyrics and sentiment would sink in
before the next one took the wooing to the next level.

No wonder that high among my
TOP 5 Books and Films ever,
are both iterations of HIGH FIDELITY;

The story,
both on the page and on the screen, is pretty simple:
how tongue-tied boys would prefer/need
to express their "tsope" feelings through music,
and the magic of the mix tape.

Author Nick Hornby's spot-on dialogue on the page,
exquisitely delivered by John Cusack in the film,
make High Fidelity the true classic
of "dick lit" and the "dick flick",

essential for every young man to survive
the minefields of love.

"Now, the making of a good compilation tape is a very subtle art.
Many do's and don'ts.

First of all,
you 're using someone else's poetry to express how you feel.

This is a delicate thing."

THE TOP 5 ESSENTIALS OF THE PERFECT MIX TAPE:

Rule #1. The Perfect Song Selection

> In the jurassic days, pre-MP3, pre-Kazaa, pre-Lime/Frostwire,
it was actually very difficult to source all the songs that I wanted
to put on my tapes; I remember that I had to buy expensive CDs
or raid my friends' music collections all over Manila, and
from Pampanga to Bicol, just to get the perfect songs.

> That was what really made the tapes special;
the sheer determination and effort involved to assemble
all the songs was definitely a big part of the charm
and convincing magic mojo of the mix tape.

"It takes ages longer than it might seem.

You gotta kick it off with a killer to grab attention.
Then you gotta take it up a notch.
But you don't want to blow your wad.
So then you gotta cool it off a notch.

There are a lot of rules."

Rule #2. The Sound Quality of the Tape

> There were three kinds of cassette tapes,
Normal, Chrome, and Metal:
Normal tapes were very cheap, and the sound was muffled;
Chrome was quite expensive, but the recordings sounded like CDs;
Metal was hard to find, prohibitive and actually quite, well, heavy.

> I always used TDK SA-90 CrO2 tapes
for those very special mix tapes, and I never used the Dolby NR;
I could fit 20-24 songs, enough music to guarantee
that my very special girl would maybe think of me for 90 minutes!

"Sentimental music has this great way of taking you back somewhere
at the same time that it takes you forward,
so you feel nostagic and hopeful all at the same time."

Rule #3. The Sequence of the Songs

> The point of the whole mix tape?
The songs, taken as a whole, had to tell a story.
There had to be a beginning, a middle, and an end.

> As such, I had to listen closely to all the lyrics,
and since this was before I could Google the words
of every song in history, this took up a lot of time,
in order to avoid the big mistakes, e.g.
Marvin Gaye's lustful "Sexual Healing" before
Sarah MacLachlan's lullabye-like "Angel".

"It's no good pretending that any relationship has a future
if your record collections disagree violently
or if your favorite films wouldn't even speak to each other
if they met at a party."

Rule #4. The Personalized Packaging

> The useful blank grids. The numerous sticker labels.

The blank tape was a tabula rasa, a canvas of musical yearning.
The external look of the mix tape was just as important
as the music inside, and it was essential that the case
would look as perfectly personalized as possible;
after all, it was a labor of love!

> I used to have Art Attacks, going absolutely insane
with my Stabilo highlighters and Staedtler 0.5mm sign pens,
ink smears and blots were the enemy that I had to avoid;
and to ensure that my astonishingly bad penmanship would be legible,
in my "lettering" process, I invented several new fonts.

"I agreed that what really matters is what you like,
not what you are like...

books, records, films --
these things matter.

Call me shallow but it's the damn truth,
and by this measure I had the best dates of my life."

Rule #5. The Surprise Song

> Too maudlin a mix, and the tape would sound like Mellow Touch FM;
too predictable a selection, and it could sound like a tape bought from SM.
There always had to be kicker, the one song that would immortalize the tape!

I always managed to insert Bong Gabriel's "Ang Aking Awitin",
that wistful song of longing, so classically Pinoy in tone and sentiment,
into a sequence of English ballads. It always became the favorite tune.

"Because music, like color, or a cloud,
is neither intelligent nor unintelligent -
it just is.

The chord,
the simplest building block for even the tritest, silliest chart song,
is a beautiful, perfect, mysterious thing,

and when an ill-read, uneducated, uncultured, emotionally illiterate boor
puts a couple of them together,
he has every chance of creating something wonderful and powerful."

The Lost Art of the Mix Tape

Nowadays, with one click, you can download whole albums;
before, I had to scour every single record store in Manila
just to find a particular CD with a particular song.
It was a lot of work, but it was often (ahem!) very well rewarded.

Nowadays, you can sequence and burn a whole "Mix CD" in 15 minutes;
before, it took hours, sometimes even days, just to finish a tape.
But a CD's cold efficiency just can't hold a candle to the burning
anticipation I could build from Side A to Side B of a cassette.

Nowadays, the equivalent of mix tapes are just too easy to make;
but for a true mix tape to really work, just like true romance,
it takes time, patience, determination, passion, and devotion.

"It's just that romance,
with its dips and turns and glooms and highs,
its swoops and swoons and blues,
is a natural metaphor for music itself"

INFLUENCE - (EVIDENCE + INFERENCE) = SILENCE

...every single one of the military men in reclusion perpetua
convicted in the Aquino Assassination still adamantly
maintain that Rolando Galman pulled the trigger;

...all the surviving associates of Ferdinand Marcos
who were implicated by inference, if not evidence,
in the program, are still holding positions of great influence;

...not a single TV commercial (!), save for ABS-CBN plugs,
was shown during the excellent documentary;
by design or by circumstance?

A Conspiracy of Silence...

with tentacles that have reached up from beyond the decades,

to this very day, a quarter of a century hence.

1st Look: The CHARIOTS OF FIRE Remake!!!

The World's Fastest Man,
USAIN BOLT,
in his first starring role!

MID-AFTERNOON in the GARDEN of GOOD and EVIL

A couple of days ago, I honored my dear old dad's birthday
by paying a visit to his mausoleum at Manila's North Cemetery.

It was a dreary, overcast, windswept day,
perfect for a walk along its chiaroscuro pathways;

the cemetery is a photographer's paradise,
overflowing with representations and lamentations
of Philippine History and Filipino Families.

"Pieta Manila"

"Mondrian"

"Art Deco Angelic"

"Presidential Immortal"

"Advice GMA Should Follow"

AUGUST 21, 1983

25 Years on,

we have a President who seems hellbent on
perpetuating herself in power forever;

we have a bloody war in Mindanao;

we have a rubber stamp Congress;

we have corruption in all levels;

we have police checkpoints;

we have an oil price crisis;

what has changed?

Was it worth dying for?

A quarter of a century ago,
his sacrifice reminded us
that our nation isn't hopeless;

hopelessly crazy, perhaps,
but definitely not hopeless.

It may take another 25 years,
but thanks to Ninoy,
I'm never giving up hope.

NOT Gore and Bush Jr.!!!!

The Top 5 Reasons Why You Should Not Miss
The AL & GEORGE Concert:

1. Al Jarreau is one of the greatest Jazz Vocalists ever.
download : "Spain"

2. George Benson is one of the greatest Jazz Guitarists ever.
download : "On Broadway"

3. Al will sing George's Breezin' (1st time ever with lyrics),
and George will deliver a virtuoso guitar solo of Al's Mornin'

4. Both will perform their new versions of:
Seals and Crofts' "Summer Breeze" and
Hall and Oates' "Everytime You Go Away"

5. They probably won't sing this Pinoy KTV staple:
"Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You"

THE TERRIBLE TELEPROMPTER TEMPER TANTRUM

Malacañang Factotums
scurrying around like frightened rats...

Pinoy Reporters
doing their best TMZ camerawork...

A Presidential Laptop
being thrown like an Olympic Discus...

it can only be...

Watch the Poster Girl for Anger Management
throw lethal dagger looks, storm out in frustration,
scream in high dudgeon, violently slap her own forehead,
and generally scare everyone half to death in this wonderful
series of hilarious vidcaps, subtitles, and the Sadako-scary video:

Kapalaran, Ang Blog ng Bayan

The Best New BEACH in the Philippines?

The untouched beauty of Caramoan?

The northern shores of Pagudpud?

The distant waters of Camiguin?

Walk This Way to find out Where It Is...

ROAM if you want to, without wings, without wheels!!!

This ought to be very good:

The Philippines' 1st
Alternative Travelling Magazine!!!

And the Premiere Issue is all about
that cantankerous yet charming city
I'm proud to call home sweet home:

Here's the official press release from
Isabetlog, a.k.a. Meandersome:

A rip-roaring shout out to all kinds of travelers:
the cheapskates, zillionaires, backpackers, adventure seekers,
campers, lost, or whatever you feel like calling yourselves!
ROAM magazine has finally landed our urban jungle!
This magazine is for you!

October Eighty Publications proudly presents ROAM—
the first and only alternative traveling magazine in the Philippines.

Hop on the crazy world of fun, spontaneous, and adventurous traveling!
Discover the hidden, learn the alternative, and live the ambiguity.

In this premiere issue,
we give you the wild slab of glorious Manila
we've all loved to hate, and hated to love.

We revive the vintage and feel the vibe of hippie Manila.
We veer away from what's pop and grand;
we drift, reroute, and experience Manila the ROAM way!

Revel our special features on the chronicled Intramuros,
oddballs of Cubao X, rave of the Manila nightlife,
rekindled balut industry in Pateros,
and the legends of the Luneta photographers.

We've got a bevy of features on urban adventures,
culture, food trips, dream destinations, city tours,
first aid, traveling in style, and a lot more!

Come on, come on! Quit on slacking and start ROAMing!

ROAM magazine is available in the major bookstores and newsstands,
at only P150.00!!!

Hit us your comments, suggestions, and spankin' violent reactions
to roam@octobereighty.com or ring us at 8935787 or 8939305.

NINOY's "YELLOW"

I drew a line,
I drew a line for you,
Oh what a thing to do,
And it was all yellow.

And you know for you,
I'd bleed myself dry for you,
I'd bleed myself dry.
It's true, look how they shine for you,

Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah, they were all yellow.

this was inevitable : BARACK ASTLEY!!!

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius

(and patience in the editing room!)

p.s.
there's no truth to the rumor that
John McCain is planning to release a similar video
with him "singing" a duet with Willie Nelson...

MICHAEL PHELPS: The Greatest!!!

Demmit.

ESPN beat me to the pun
"Great Haul of China"!!!

9 DAYS.

8 GOLDS.

7 WORLD RECORDS.

1 MAN.

Thank You,
SOLAR SPORTS,

for giving Filipinos the best ever coverage of the
OLYMPICS!!!

You all deserve a Gold Medal too!!!

I Love My SEXY Name!!!

In my life,
I've met more animals than people named "Spanky".

I can't tell you how many times I've heard friends say:
"Hey, you've got the same name as my dog/goldfish/hamster!!!"

Even Michael Jackson's dog was my tocayo.

While I'm pleased that my dear old dad
gave me a unique name, after this "Little Rascal":

I had to go through a lot of teasing growing up,
not just because of my canine nickname, but also
because the two Spankys in pop culture then were:

Uncle Bob's Lucky 7 Club mascot,
Spanky the Elephant;

VST & Company bassist and TODAS comedian,
Spanky Rigor;

Thankfully,
I discovered these more serious Spankys:

Nora Aunor's co-star in the classic "Himala",
the actor Spanky Manikan;

Former PLDT General Counsel and Senior Executive VP,
USec. Spanky Perez;

A few years ago, I found out what "Spanking the Monkey" meant,
and if that wasn't bad enough, there's the X-rated "Spunk",
which incidentally, is how some GROs mispronounce my name!
("Spunk... pag-four pa kita ng beer?")

And speaking of which,
what the hell is this DVD all about?!?!?!

I've realized that my name,
compared to the cute and funny connotations of my childhood,
now is more of a catchphrase for the kinky and the risqué,
including Madonna's ode to the joys of spanking:

"Some girls, they like candy, and others, they like to grind,
I'll settle for the back of your hand somewhere on my behind.
Treat me like I'm a bad girl, even when I'm being good to you,
I don't want you to thank me, you can just spank me. Mmm.

Like hanky panky [hanky panky],
Nothing like a good spanky [good spanky]"

Nowadays, more people call me "Spanx";
and sure enough,
it became the hottest name in ladies' underwear:

Yup, even OPRAH loves SPANX!!!